Your listener most likely has not had the benefit of being prepared for the conversation. They may not know anything about life with a stoma, and may be concerned about how, or if, this will impact your relationship.
Sometimes people struggle with the news, and may also need to take a moment to understand the changes. Especially if your stoma surgery had not been planned. They will need time to adjust, in the same way that you do.
Talk together to understand the common worries you might have, and build on what you share to create an understanding. This is the best way to get a constructive, giving conversation.
There is more to you than your stoma
It's easy to become obsessed with talking about your stoma and focusing on it. Shifting focus away from your stoma from time to time to resume conversations about your passions, hobbies and interests will help reassure friends and family that your relationship has not changed.
You don't need to include everybody
When discussing your condition with anyone, you put yourself in a deeply vulnerable position. And with the exception of any children or grandchildren, you should have these conversations for your sake, not for others.
If someone is not giving you the opportunity to express your thoughts and feelings but rather bombarding you with advice, however well-meaning, feel free to close down the conversation.